Civil Wars, Red Beans and Rice!

June 5, 2005

red-beans-1.jpg

INT. TRAILER–LATE AFTERNOON

Mr. R. enters in a tattered uniform of the Confederate Army and a deep layer of makeup. His dense, dark hair is slicked back neatly, but there are fake cuts and scrapes across his broad forehead. Caryn stifles a laugh from the stove.

CARYN

(in her thickest Southern accent)

Is the wah over?

MR. R.

No, just breaking for lunch, Miss Scarlett.

Caryn takes the lid off a large pot on the stove. She scoops a heavy ladle of thick, red beans into the bowl. Mr. R. picks a piece of andouille sausage from the pot.

MR. R. (CONT’D)

If your army ate this well, y’all might have won.

She adds a spoonful of buttered rice to the beans and hands it to the soldier. He plops down on the couch to eat.

MR. R. (CONT’D)

Who ever heard of a Civil War comedy anyway?

He is barely on his second spoonful when the door opens and Lauren walks in. She is dressed down in an attempt to fit in with the crew, but her $400 jeans somehow miss the mark.

LAUREN

I swear our caterers make the worst coffee on the planet.

She slams her cup on the table and pulls a Diet Coke from the fridge, just as the door opens again and Miss A. makes the reunion complete. She is the worst dressed of all in a pink, corseted hoop-dress. Obnoxious curls bob from her whole head.

MISS A.

The AC is out in my trailer. Mind if I crash in here?

No one responds, but she wasn’t really asking. Caryn steps nimbly aside as Miss A. helps herself to a bowl of the beans.

LAUREN

You don’t have much room in that corset to eat.

MISS A.

I know. Loosen it for me, will you?

Lauren sighs and makes half an effort to untie the strings. Mr. R. continues to eat, trying not to spill on his costume. Caryn pretends to clean around the stove.

When the strings are slightly loosened, Lauren steps back to assess any damage to her nails. Miss A. takes her bowl to the door.

MISS A. (CONT’D)

Well, I’m wrapped after the next shot. So I’ll see you at eight?

Unsure who she’s talking to, Lauren and Caryn look toward Mr. R. who nods quietly without looking up.

MISS A. (CONT’D)

Good. I’m gonna go get my makeup touched up.

She leaves. Caryn resumes her pseudo-cleaning, but Lauren stares at Mr. R. a moment.

LAUREN

You know you’re in every shot for the remainder of the day.

Mr. R. sets his bowl aside.

MR. R.

Yeah, but I think we’ll finish a little early.

Lauren laughs icily and starts for the door too.

LAUREN

Wouldn’t count on it, Big Guy.

As soon as she’s gone, Mr. R. shakes his fingers through his hair, effectively messing up the design. He leans back on the couch with his eyes closed. Caryn wipes vigorously at a non-existent spot.

MR. R.

No, Caryn, the war rages on.

I have been looking forward to trying one of the recipes at New Orleans Cuisine and the Red Beans and Rice is a perfect example of Danno’s commitment to authentic cuisine from Louisiana. I substituted a meaty ham bone for the neck bones. The tender meat slowly fell off the bone as the beans simmered. For someone who spent a large portion of her life within shouting distance of Creole and Cajun Country, I couldn’t have been happier with this recipe!

5 thoughts on “Civil Wars, Red Beans and Rice!

  1. Danno

    Thank you for the kind words Caryn! I’m very happy that you enjoyed the recipe, Ham Hocks make a stellar pot of Red Beans! My, Oh My! They look more beautiful than ever with your expert camera work! Nicely done!

    Reply
  2. Moira

    Hi Caryn,

    I usually make my red beans with adzuki beans, but I’ll have to give Danno’s authentic recipe a try…it sounds fab!

    Reply
  3. Leannwoo

    “His dense, dark hair is slicked back neatly” “broad forehead” YEAH! We got something! Woooohhooooo!

    Oh, and the beans look mouth-watering! Made a pot of mixed red, black and white beans for dinner Sunday night with a homemade veggie stock, some chicken & pork & brown rice. Yours sounds good, gonna have to try it, kind of like mom used to make. :)

    Reply
  4. caryn

    Danno, this wasn’t my favorite photo that I’ve taken. Mainly because I didn’t have much time–everyone wanted to eat! I love the lingering smell of the seasonings in my kitchen. Definitely a must-make-again!

    Moira, I’ve never tried adzuki beans. Hm. Interesting…

    I try to please, Leanwoo. ;)

    Reply

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